Chicken

The other night we were at Rob's parents for dinner. His mom had made a delicious chicken dish so we were throwing around the word, 'chicken' more than usual. None of us remember exactly how it all transpired but suddenly I could see the little wheels in Caroline's head spinning. She asked a question about chicken feathers that led us all to realize that she thought the chicken we were eating shared only a name with our feathered friends. She had no idea that she had been eating real chickens all her life.

Until then. And then, she thought and thought and thought.

While she continued to eat that night and has eaten chicken since, the thoughtful look on face has convinced me that I will have a vegetarian child at some point sooner rather than later. Her mind has always gone the extra mile, thinking through things to a level that I don't even often go. I have always known that this will present challenges. It appears that one of my first challenges will be to master the mystery that is tofu.

Food

Caroline has a good friend at school who we will call Lucy. Lucy's mom, who we'll call Mary, invited us over for dinner tonight. Interestingly, while Caroline has made lots of friends, as have I, since our move this was the first time that our entire family has been invited for a dinner. Somehow, in this time, our girls eating habits have deteriorated to a pretty embarrassing level.

About six months ago, I noticed that I had become the short order chef that I swore I never would be. Pasta, pizza and quesadillas were pretty much the only meals that everyone ate. Most nights I found myself cooking one meal for Rob and me and a separate meal for the girls. Since realizing this, I have known that I had to change our ways but I have been putting it off and putting it off. I have been quite sure that the change was going to be drastic and not pretty. I can't quite imagine doing anything short of offering one meal and nothing else. I imagine a bunch of hungry and grumpy nights before any progress is made. For obvious reasons, this is not a change I have been anxious to make.

Until tonight...

Tonight we were served lasagna, bread and salad. Katherine ate the middle of her bread and Caroline ate Katherine's left over crusts. And of course, they both ate dessert. Fortunately, this is pretty much par for the course for Katherine so she did not make a big deal of it. Her idea of heaven is bread for breakfast, lunch and dinner. Caroline on the other hand kept talking about how much she didn't like the lasagna. I began to think she was expecting me to walk into the kitchen and whip up a batch of mac n' cheese.

Fortunately, Mary and her husband, who we'll call Ted, couldn't have been nicer about the whole thing. I am sure, though, that we have given them plenty of material to talk about. Their daughter had two servings of lasagna, asked to be excused and helped to carry the dishes to the kitchen.

So... game on... By the time the new year arrives, I have pledged to face my fears head on and begin to raise eaters- eaters who we can take with us to family dinners without apology.

New Jersey Moms Blog

I have a new post up at New Jersey Moms Blog. You can read it here...

My Dad

My Dad died in February of 2007 when Katherine was only ten months old. He spent a lot of time with her and there are many pictures of them together- thank goodness. I have thought often of how Katherine will never know my dad and will have no true memories of him.

Last night, the girls were looking through pictures on Rob's lap top. One of the sets they looked through included pictures of a beach trip we took with my dad when Caroline was about two. I was looking over their shoulders when Katherine looked at a particular picture and said, "Look, your dad and Caroline are reading together."

Katherine is very interested in assigning relationships right now. She often refers to people by their titles- 'my babysitter, my teacher, my sister.' I was so thrilled when she said, "Your dad." Through the beauty of pictures, she will know my dad, know that he was my dad, know that he was her gran'dad.

Later in the evening, Katherine and Rob were talking about all her grandparents. She listed Grandma, Grandpa and Mimi and then asked Rob, "Does Mommy have a daddy?" Thank goodness, Rob was able to refer to our earlier conversation and in a minute Katherine was able to imagine her gran'dad in her mind's eye.

If ever I needed motivation to keep taking pictures...

Worth It?

Yesterday we drove into the city to see the Rockefeller Center Christmas tree. Caroline had been asking and asking to go see the "big tree." One day last week she even told me that she wished she lived in New York City so that "she could be close to the big Christmas tree."

Fortunately...we got in and out of the city with little traffic given how close we are to Christmas...

Fortunately... Katherine looked around the whole time we were there as if the tall buildings, bright lights and throngs of people were the coolest things she had ever seen...

Fortunately... Katherine was in the awe of the big tree and her smile was contagious...

Fortunately... we went to the parking garage that is super cheap and the parking attendant was too busy to notice that we had only parked our car for 40 minutes...

Unfortunately... the massive crowds proved too much for Caroline. She could be heard saying, "This is the worse day of my life." "I want to go home, now!" "The sidewalks are like a traffic jam with people instead of cars," and my personal favorite, "I feel like we are walking to California!"

So my question remains, "Worth it?"

A Girl After My Own Heart

I have always strayed far from talking toys, loud toys, toys that require batteries. Needless to say, I really am not crazy about talking or singing books but... today, for some reason, I bought a copy of Frosty the Snowman that played a tinny version of the song every time you opened the book.

As we were getting ready to read right before nap time, Katherine opened Frosty. It was playing for a bit before she said, "How can we read with that noise. Mommy, turn off that noise. Read!"

Apparently the apple does not fall far from the tree...

'Tis the Season

This weekend we decorated our Christmas tree. During the process, I was fortunate to watch my girls at their best.

As Katherine hung an ornament that she had chosen with her grandmother at a Christmas store this summer, she dropped it. Elmo became detached from the gift box he was jumping out of... I anticipated screams and tears. Instead Katherine said with true empathy, "Poor Elmo." Caroline was getting ready to hang her ornament from the beach, one she had been waiting to hang since August. After Katherine dropped and broke hers, Caroline walked up to her, handed Katherine her beach ornament and said, "Here, you can hang mine."

How nice to be reminded of what sweet little girls we have...

Lucky

In our town, just 15 miles outside of New York City, there are many wives who are essentially raising their children alone. Their husbands wake early and return home after the children are in bed. Many of the husbands travel for work more than they are at home. Rob's job as a financial planner allows him unusual flexibility. While he does work at odd times, he is almost always home before the girls go to bed and he is often home for dinner. Rob has also not travled for work since the summer.

A good friend of ours from Richmond lost their mom suddenly at the end of last week. Rob left this morning to drive to Richmond for the memorial service. It is often when he is gone, that we realize how lucky we are to have him around as much as we do. Caroline cried for a long time after he left. I called and begged my mother in law to have us over for dinner. And then, at bed time tonight Katherine made the comment that summed it all up...

Every night, I read Katherine three books before bed and after we snuggle for a bit, we call Rob and Caroline in to say goodnight. This is a very well established ritual. Tonight she continued to snuggle after Caroline came in for her goodnight hug and kiss. Katherine finally looked up at me and said, "Will Daddy be home if we snuggle for long enough?" It was so cute I could have snuggled until tomorrow afternoon when Rob will indeed be home.

Questions

I was just reading back through old writing notebooks. I am trying to pull together a piece for this fantastic on-line writing class that I am taking. Sometimes I can find ideas if I go back and read... today though I only found a reason to keep writing in my notebook.

On day last January, I wrote down a list of questions that Caroline had asked. I have no recollection of these- thank goodness I wrote them down!

Here goes:

1. Why did you say "How's life?"
2. How do you know they won't be there?"
3. Where does the poop and pee go?
4. How do the babies get out of the tummies?
5. Then where does the poop and pee go?
6. Why is the sun so hot?
7. What do you see in space?
8. How do you take an x-ray?
9. What do you do if you have to pee when you are having a baby?
10. What did Aunt Karen look like when she was little?
11. Was Gran'Dad's name Arthur?
12. You know that picture of you and your grandma?
13. Where did you get that necklace?
14. Could bees sting themselves?
15. What time is it in South America?

Make new friends

but keep the old...

Last week, good friends of ours from Richmond were in New Jersey visiting family. We were lucky enough to have them come by for dinner. After they left Caroline (and the rest of us!) were feeling a little sad about our move. As much as we love our new life in New Jersey, there was something so relaxing about being with people who have known you for longer than a year. There were no background stories to tell, no explaining to do, no questions about common interests or views. As I put Caroline to bed that night, we were talking about the difference between old friends and new friends. I was trying to explain the pros and cons of both- trying to give her space to feel sad but also to realize the fun of being where we are.

As usual, she got it and then some. Before I could finish a sentence, she began singing the Girl Scout song (they had learned it in school); "Make new friends but keep the old. One is silver and the other gold."

Well said...

A Meme

I found this meme on the fun blog, Food for Thought. Seemed like an interesting one to do...

1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE? my maternal grandmother and my aunt

2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED? Watching Secret Life of Bees two days after the election. It really made the whole thing that much more amazing...

3. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING? No. I used to have really neat handwriting and now I rush and it is so messy!

4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT? I really don't like lunch meat.

5. DO YOU HAVE KIDS? Two girls

6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU? Of course!

7. DO YOU USE SARCASM A LOT? Yes- probably more than I should...

8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS. Yes.

9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP? Absolutely not.

10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL? Oatmeal with apples, walnuts and maple syrup.

11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF? No. And it sure makes it harder to put them back on the next times!

12. DO YOU THINK YOU ARE STRONG? Yes. After starting my addicting Lotte Berk exercise class, I know I am stronger than I ever have been!

13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM? Chocolate chip.

14. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE? If they are funny.

15. RED OR PINK? Pink

16. WHAT IS THE LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF? My dark under eye circles.

17. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST? My dad

18. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO SEND THIS BACK TO YOU? Only if they want...

19. WHAT COLOR SHOES ARE YOU WEARING? White socks

20. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE? The cereal mentioned above!

21. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW? Caroline playing school in the family room and I'm listening to hear if Katherine is waking up...

22. IF YOU WHERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE? Blue

23. FAVORITE SMELLS? The ocean, fall leaves, freshly mown grass

24. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE? My sister in law

25. DO YOU LIKE THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU? Yes!

26. FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH? Gosh, I haven't watched any sports in a long time... Soryy Rob!

27. HAIR COLOR? Brown

28. EYE COLOR? Brown

29. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS? No.

30. FAVORITE FOOD? Ice cream

31. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS? definitely happy endings

32. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED? Secret Life of Bees

33. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING? Black

34. SUMMER OR WINTER? Summer!

35. HUGS OR KISSES? Depends, right?

36. FAVORITE DESSERT? Yellow cake with chocolate icing

37. MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND? Vanessa

38. LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND. Whoever doesn’t feel like it

39. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW? American Wife by Curtis Sittenfeld

40. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD? A picture of Caroline dressed up as a flower for Halloween a few years ago..

41. WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON TV LAST NIGHT? Nothing.

42. FAVORITE SOUND. Katherine reading to her dolls before she goes to sleep. Caroline playing school.

43. ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES? Beatles

44. WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME? Europe

45. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT? Making people laugh.

46. WHERE WERE YOU BORN? Providence, RI

47. WHOSE ANSWERS ARE YOU LOOKING FORWARD TO GETTING BACK? Anybody who's interested

The Power of Observation

We have always said that Caroline has an incredibly keen sense of observation. She proved us correct again the other day...

Rob was putting on hand lotion (after a hard afternoon of raking our millions of leaves!!) and he had taken off his wedding ring. From across the room, Caroline noticed that Rob had his ring off. She commented on this and then said, "If you were walking down the street and a woman bumped into you, she would think she could marry you!"

Some man had better be pretty careful when he marries our little girl!